Sleeping Around no. 1: “The Reason Why I’m Easy” | Autostraddle

While I Will Be loathe to intervene of this grass so correctly portrayed in the Emmy nominated, critically lauded ‘

The True L World’

, the amount of time has come for Autostraddle to place their own proverbial hat to the gender column band. Since it is very difficult to locate genuine stories by real lesbians about lesbian intercourse on these here internets. So now I present “resting Around”: a brand new column documenting my personal intimate conquests, emotional bitch-slaps, carnal fumbles, and union follies. Please be aware I am going to be using the conditions ‘dating’ and ‘relationship’ extremely loosely. Obvs all names tend to be altered for protection — mine mainly, additionally those we come across.

Column 1: WHY I’M VERY EASY

On Monday my deafening, bisexual, beauty products artist pal Georgia welcomed us to the closing nights Spotlight — LA’s oldest gay bar, a pleasant diving becoming elbowed out by climbing rents in an extremely yuppified part of Hollywood. First situations first: we make my personal method to the bar, order a G&T, and plaintively ask the bartender if he’s any peanuts. Lease’s due and I’m skint, therefore I are trying out cutting way-down on nonessentials, including food. He kinda rustles right up a bowl of pita potato chips, and I also rabidly look in whilst acting to listen to small-talk around me and trying not to look an excessive amount of like a feral kid.

After a few years one of many darkly clothed twenty-somethings buys myself a glass or two, so we commence chitchat/vague thoughts of feasible interest which are impossible to identify. She’s 28 and an actuality TV producer for just one from the wire sites, specializing in type of bro-ish gross/freak out type reveals. She’s appealing, if you don’t rather — blue-eyes, gothic hair (with visible roots), and a little more zaftig than I usually prefer but good boobies. Personality and intelligence-wise she’s far above typical — amusing, dark spontaneity, and self-confident yet not arrogant. Since evening continues she looks curious but a little aloof, sort of like a stylish bro flanked by acceptance seeking sorority pledges at their own basic mixer. I really don’t specially care and in fact benefit from the presence of a periodic intelligent bro, providing these are typically isolated from pack. After a number of rounds of whiskey and a late evening snack we head back to her Los Feliz household to have drinks. Obvs.

We both understand the power drill and after a short game of remove ingesting online game poker (I’m always changing the principles for this it pretty much involves sipping any time you winnings, drinking a lot more in the event that you drop, and informing ladies to take off various items of clothing.) hook up on her behalf couch subsequently bed. Layla is sadly on her duration but appears extremely thinking about showing the woman hand dexterity. Really amazing, and effects consist of two very nice orgasms. This is certainly a pleasing shock because frequently required more than just hands for me, and I happily snuggle into rest, creating a mental notice to inquire of for tips if we ever before connect again.

Another day my bad, unspeakably miserable hook-up human anatomy alarm goes down at 6:30. Jesus. It’s a God-awful evolutionary event left over from university: when I sleep aside, the security unfailingly goes down between 5-8 am, and I also awake prepared, energized and ready to serenity. Normally we’ll only say bye and go, but she drove. Ughh. As my body wriggles into awareness Layla brings myself better and temporarily gets to provide myself another bang before falling back again to rest. “Well that’s great,” i believe to me “exactly what am I designed to do now?” Trapped until she awakes, we sneak off to perform a fast morning after fix up from inside the bathroom, seize a magazine from living room, and try not to ever change the web pages also loudly.

We check-out brunch. She is seriously hungover and I am obnoxiously perky (another side influence of devil’s security) when she falls myself off I consider a so long kiss but rather merely laugh, say “Bye guy, many thanks for the ride”, and quickly walk into my personal building.

Layla is not the actual only real dyke who are able to channel bro.

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Epilogue: weekly after the nights summer lovin’, I glance at my telephone, pause, then punch ‘delete’. We exchanged several texts, but never ever found upwards- she didn’t go out on the nights I did, and neither of us questioned to see both once again. As a person who loved “he is not That Into You” an excessive amount of (we react well to brutality) if someone else doesn’t program energy, I do not reveal interest. Due to the fact hidden link between Layla and I disappear, i can not assist but feel a pang of… regret? Not exactly. Missing crave? No, not necessarily. Its a sliver of lonenliness that punches little openings within my gut. Layla ended up being funny and refreshingly original, and I also wouln’t have oriented a friend such as that. Just about the most complicated aspects of becoming a lesbian is navigating connections with other gay women: are we ideal becoming pals or fuckbuddies or forever immediately after? How hell have always been we expected to know very well what to do (or not doing) with someone I just met? All the time we’re told through all of our mothers/shrinks/friends the conventional knowledge of relationships: powerful relationships are built from a foundation of friendship.

But is it possible to construct an important friendship from an intimate connection? If yes, just how can it be done?

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Michelle Mishka Colombo
2011